You might have read my bio on RDNation. If
not, well, sorry for you then hahaha! But if you did, you’ve
noticed that I fulfil some different roles within my league besides
being a skater, which is quite handy (think about inspiration and
diversity) when you decide to write some articles and/or blogs
for Rollin News for example, or just for yourself. This time I’d
like to share a little story about me being a trainer and what that
means to me as a person in general.
So, recently I started as a trainer at
my league. More specifically, a fresh meat trainer, and even more
recent as an offskates trainer. But I have to admit that I actually
never expected to become a trainer…..at all….in any way
whatsoever. Partially because I was insecure and partially because I
actually disliked the idea standing and explaining in front of a lot
of people. But, I’m a trainer now so what happened?
Well, a lot happened actually and those
happenings made lots of changes in my state of mind and in ways of my
perspectives, you can say they made me a different but better person
(or at least that’s what I’d like to believe). These things were
already happening over a couple of years in general, but the
changes went into turbo mode when I got more and more involved into
A little bit of psychology: Most of the
time you can divide people into two sorts of personalities. Without
going way too deep into the psychology stuff, let’s say you have
extrovert types and introvert types. Between these you can make way
more diversions of the personality but hey, let’s keep it simple
right? Let’s try to make things more clear.
Introvert people tend to be more inward
turning or focused more on internal thoughts, feelings and moods
rather than seeking out external stimulation. Introverts tend to be quiet, reserved and introspective. They often also expend energy
in social situations. For example: after attending a party, introvert
people often feel the need to recharge by spending some time
alone. Extrovert people tend to seek out more social stimulation and
opportunities to engage with others. In group situations they are
likely to talk often and assert themselves. Introvert is not the
same as shyness and they’re not afraid of social situations; they
simply like to spend more time alone and don’t need that much
social stimulation. Both types are beautiful, don’t get me wrong,
and don’t differ that much from each other. If you want to know more
about these types, Google is your best friend for that.
I’m part of the last group, an
introvert type. I do things differently being ‘ kinda’ inward. I
can really live in my head so to speak. I’m well aware of that, so
I’m able to kick myself out of it. I love going out and share great
time with people but sometimes it just wears me out. I can’t help it,
it’s just the way it is. I also never liked, nor felt comfortable in
any way being at or in the front of things, especially when there
were more than one person involved. For example: at high school the
teachers thought up those horrible torture assignments called presentations. I wasn’t able to sleep for a week! And when the big
moment came to actually stand in front of 25 know-it-alls, I really
thought I was going to die or at least faint. Didn’t happen though,
and according to my classmates and teachers they never saw that I was
nervous as hell, but the way I felt from the inside….
So in sports (I have participated in
waterpolo and dayto ryu aiki jiutsu for quite a while) or at my
day jobs, I usually work from behind the screens. That’s my strength
and that’s the place where I used to flourish. There, I am
not nervous nor feel insecure, but when I’m in front of more
than one person for example, well, it’s like roller coaster ride
gone bad. Not feeling insecure or nervous just because there are a lot of people around you is needed (in my opinion) for being a referee and/or a trainer.
I already knew that I loved to search out and try new training drills, on and offskates, experiment with it a bit
to become a better skater and athlete. Since I’ve been reffing already
for a while, I also became used to the fact that you have to explain
or teach things to others; something which I found I secretly
enjoyed doing. I said secretly because I’m not the kind of
person who steps forward and says; Hi I’m your new trainer, let’s
roll! I mean, I'm confident but not so much I would just do that
I kinda fell, or rolled, into the
trainer's part. It happened when an offskates trainer was late for
practice. I offered to take over that role from her so she could
attend her meeting, and it helped to keep the continuity of the training session. What I didn’t expect, was the fact that I for one, enjoyed it very much but also, the skaters really enjoyed it. I
received such great feedback, it opened my eyes.
Some time later, I
participated in conducting a training session for the fresh meat. I
studied up on some drills to do. However, I was slightly nervous
even though I knew the girls well. I kept asking myself if it was to much, or too heavy or even fun. Well, after practice, again I saw
smiling faces and even heard comments that they hoped I would lead some
training again. This motivated me so much on many levels. I
learned a lot myself (in more ways than one) and I saw a growing
motivation in others. It went both ways so to speak.
There was a spot free for a fresh meat
trainer. After discussing it with good friends from within the
league, I asked how they would feel if I applied, and eventually I did.
So yes, I had and sometimes still have, to push myself to give
practice. Of course, on track you have to push yourself too, but in a
different way (at least that’s how I experience it). Still, after
doing a training I’m totally worn out but there’s one difference:
I feel content about it and am already thinking about leading another session. Which drills will I let them do next, how they have grown since their last practice and did they enjoy themselves (I saw a lot of
real smiles, so they did).
You see here, actually as much as I
like working from behind a screen, I really love working this way at
the front. I don’t mind standing in front of 25 know-it-alls
anymore, so bye bye insecurity! It took time, motivation,
determination, sometimes courage and just plain jumping into the dark
to get where I’m now. This, in combination with an awful lot of
great support of my friends it has totally worked out (all of this in real
life and derby life).
Yes, there are still some anxiety or
some nervous moments, but that’s ok. The world is not gonna end if
I don’t know exactly everything, or just don’t find my words for
some reason. I’m a human not a robot. I believe that in becoming a
trainer in multiple disciplines has made me more confident as a
person and even more motivated about skating than I already was, which
is exactly the thing I needed. I want to learn more and what I've learned, I’m going to teach the new skaters. I'm glad and proud that I
made the choice in giving practice and I don’t want to go back.
So kick yourself out of your safe zone
and explore; it might be scary but it’s so worth it!