MRDA Championships: Your Mom Grounds Shock Exchange, 249-130

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SIOUX CITY, IA–In a bout that turned, as so many do, on power jams, Your Mom Men’s Derby took out the top slot at the Men’s Roller Derby Association Championships for the second year in a row, putting up a rather more decisive margin over perennial contenders the New York Shock Exchange than in last year’s one-point victory over the St Louis Gatekeepers. The final score was Your Mom 249, Shock Exchange 130.

New York opened on a high note with Jonathan R taking the first lead jammer status of the night and Carnage Asada putting the first big points on the board with a 22-point power jam over Frank Notsohotra two minutes in. Your Mom struck back with a power jam for Twinkle Toes a couple of minutes later to take the lead at 47-40–and the Des Moines side followed up with two more power jams by Twinkle Toes and Lily Pad to stretch the margin to 17 points.

The Shock Exchange got its first big break of the half when Ladies Knight took the line alone. His 20-point power jam pushed New York into the lead for the first time since the start of the game. However, Des Moines’ defensive lines forced a penalty on jammer Jonathan R and gave Frank Notsohotra and Peter Pan the opportunity to retake the lead. New York penalty trouble continued and Peter Pan capitalised on it, closing out the first half with a 20-point power jam.

When play resumed, New York again opened big: a star pass from Bane-ana to Buster Cheatin followed by a five-point power jam for Ladies Knight pushed the Shock Exchange closer. But for most of the period, Your Mom seemed intent on demonstrating that their offense was just as dangerous as their defense–and they started that demonstration with a set of power jams for Twinkle Toes and Frank Notsohotra that between them put another 20 points on the board.

The point of no return for New York was a 20-point power jam by Frank Not So Hotra with seventeen minutes gone in the second period–and Your Mom dominated in the remaining time, holding the Shock Exchange scoreless for seven of the final ten minutes. Despite the defensive work of Abe Drinkin’ and the dual jamming and blocking power of Malcolm Sex, Des Moines continued to stretch their lead and ultimately skated out with a 249-130 win, and the Championship title.

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