Calamity Janes 112, Les Duchesses 289

MRD Calamity Janes vs. Roller Derby Quebec’s Les Duchesses | February 15, 2014 | Happy Wheels Skate Center, Portland, Maine | Bout Recap by: Sparrowhawk


Photo by Micah Brown

Maine Roller Derby was proud to kick off our 2014 season with a showdown between our Calamity Janes and the skaters from Roller Derby Quebec, Les Duchesses. The bout started off with a bang as #333 Kirsten Damned not only nabbed lead jammer status but jumped the apex to score four points for the Janes. Going forward, neither team held an advantage – lead jammer was 50/50 and neither team had more than a 6 point lead – until the 12th jam. It was then when a low block penalty on Les Duchesses’ jammer #27 Booty Allen meant the Janes had a full minute to assist jammer #7 Zeldangerous on a 15-0 power jam.  Good offense and an exciting star pass kept the Janes ahead, with Quebec hanging on for the ride. Smart jammer plays sometimes forced the opposing team to call the jam early, like in jam 15 when #31 Wilykat, after being hit and demonstrating some impressive maneuvering to stay in bounds, caught Duchesses’ #911 Nana Bistouri and prevented her from scoring. The overwhelming theme of the first half of this bout was the perfect 4-0 jam, with each team masterfully gaining lead jammer status and preventing the other team from making any gains. Two power jams toward the end of the first half left the Janes down, at first by only 20 points. Despite impressive defense from the Janes, Quebec capitalized on 10+ point power jams and those beautiful 4-0 jams, executed by impressive jammers like #911 Nana Bistouri and #92 Minnie Small. Quebec managed to prevent the Janes from scoring a frustrating EIGHT jams in a row, going into halftime with a score of 154-64.


Photo By Micah Brown

Starting off the second half with three skaters in the penalty box seemed like it would destroy the Janes’ morale, but in the second jam #333 Kirsten Damned took advantage of an assist from #86 Hans Yolo to score four points, beginning the climb back up from their 100 point deficit. The third jam of the period saw a track cut penalty called on jammer #7 Zeldangerous, which was overturned after an official review. Both teams were fighting hard at this point. Quebec fought to keep their lead by utilizing #242 Beat’on The Quads and #16 Benoite Sex-Teen to implement some painful defense to keep the Janes jammer in the pack. The Janes continued to use offensive plays to get their jammer out in time to hold Quebec to 0-0 jams, including a merciless hit by #512 WrexZilla against #911 Nana Bistouri and a point-scoring mohawk by #7 Zeldangerous that brought Janes fans to their feet. Seriously, people went CRAZY. The Janes defense was working well to hold the opposing jammer, with blockers like #716 Cabbage Smash Kid landing some good hits and #350 Cherry Clobber holding the opposing jammer at the front of the pack with plenty of time for her team to recycle to the front. It was so exciting to see effective tandem blocking from #9 Curve Appeal and #B12 Nutritional Beast in one jam followed by sweeping offense by #3000 Brannigan’s Law in the next. These plays helped the Janes to five consecutive lead jammer calls in the final minutes of the bout, and despite the fact that they were down almost 150 points, the Janes gave the crowd a thrilling final few minutes of gameplay. In jam 23, with only #512 WrexZilla and #127 Tokyo Rollz blocking on the track, Janes captain #333 Kirsten Damned made the crowd ROAR by playing defense against Quebec’s jammer #27 Booty Allen. In the end, Les Duchesses implemented relentless offensive plays, and their quick recycling and blocker assists proved insurmountable, and they took the bout with a final score of 289-112.

Photo by Micah Brown










Calamity Janes: Zeldangerous (46)

Les Duchesses: Nana Bistouri (98)



Calamity Janes: Brannigan’s Law

Les Duchesses: Feline Dion



Calamity Janes: Kirsten Damned

Les Duchesses: Nana Bistouri




Brannigan’s Law | Cabbage Smash Kid | Cherry Clobber | Curve Appeal | Hans Yolo | Kirsten Damned | Nutritional Beast | The Rehabiliskater | Tokyo Rollz | View Grind’er | Wilykat | Wrexzilla | Zeldangerous



Beaten on the Quads | Benoite Sex-teen | Booty Allen | Dina Myth | Douche Nukem | Feline Dion | Lady Mariane | Minnie Small | Mitsou Bitchy | Mobydith | Nana Bistouri | So-viet

About The Author


Rollin News Author

Share what you think

Add comment

Please Login or Register To Add A Comment